I’ve been doing a lot of thinking these last few years about my walk with God and exactly what it means. A lot of the ideas and beliefs I've held have been challenged and I've had to rethink if not change the way I see things. I will forever believe in a God of love, justice, mercy, faithfulness and many of his other characteristics. But I question the teachings of everything working out the way we pray.
I do believe He is a God who answers prayer but I will reject that when bad things happen it is because we did not pray enough or have enough faith. That God did not answer. I know He is in charge but I struggle with trusting His leading and decisions.
Because I know He is in charge I also know He knows what is best. His best for us is often not what we consider the best. We cling to scriptures such as Jeremiah 29:11, 3 John 1:2 but do we read them differently then God intended?
What does prosper in 3 John mean? In the Strong concordance it says “to prosper, be successful” I just don’t think it means to prosper as to make money, to show a profit. I believe it does to mean to be successful but by God’s scale, to thrive.
God’s idea of success is quite different than ours. I heard it said one time that a successful pastor is not one who has the largest church, makes lots of money but one whose children follow God as he has shown them.
I believe that is how God measures success in all we do. Do we exude Him in all we do? Does our life shine Christ when all life seems to be coming apart at the seams? When we’re not sure what we are going to do?
Like I said in the beginning, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking. Still trying to find the balance and find my way. That’s the great thing about serving God. Life is a journey, sort of like a bowl of spaghetti sometimes, all mixed up. I will get up and continue, no matter how many times I stumble and fall.